A heavy stone weighed down my heart. That massive stone darkened my whole world. Tears were meant to cleanse, but they held me captive, like a fading flower trapped in despair.
Where are you, my God?
By morning, my heart sensed the avalanche coming to bury me. This burden aches in my body. Oh my God, what’s happening? Will it drag me down, defeated, or will someone save me?
Where are you, my God?
I listen to the weakening beat of my heart. I feel the emptiness screaming inside it. I am losing strength and will to live. I’m sinking into darkness.
Where are you, my God?
I smell the pine above me. The birds are still joyful. Yet the abyss keeps swallowing more of me, spreading its blackness around. Sadness tightens its grip around my throat, stealing my breath. In my mind, I cry out to heaven, in agony — death approaches.
Where are you, my God?
I’m losing consciousness, gasping for air. My heartbeat is barely audible. Fear fades; a distant light flickers. Though far away, it still shines — it exists.
I don’t know how long I lay there — I lost sight, smell, and hearing. I had accepted that I was leaving this world, when suddenly God appeared.
In the summer dew on the leaves, the grass, in the glowing trees, He quietly knelt by me.
“I am here,” He said, absorbing all my pain.
I opened my eyes, swollen from crying, and saw the miracle all around me again.
How miraculous it is — even if only a memory — that God came and saved me.
Now, whenever something troubles me or fear stirs, I simply ask:
“Where are you, my Lord?”
And in my heart, I already feel —
“I am here, my daughter, because I love you so much.”
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